Oh, then I'll gladly do it as a gift. You like gifts, right? Especially gifts which stab you in the chest, those ones really pack quite the surprise.

[He doesn't like that look, and that smile falls down into a disgusted scowl as he turns around, folding his arms in obvious disapproval.]

And please, unless you gave them my name and address and other extraneous details which you know nothing about, I don't think I'll be in too much trouble.

Humans are dumb as bricks. They'll be digging for that black liquid out in the ground because of how vague the info about it is. You have heard of oil, haven't you?